Breakups are never easy, especially when they happen right before Valentine’s Day. I (19M) had been casually seeing this girl (19F) for a couple of months when she suddenly told me she wanted to end things. The reason? She had started talking to someone else again and wanted to give it another shot—with her ex. At first, I was surprised. Then, once I realized who she was talking about, I couldn’t help but laugh. Not out of bitterness, but because of how ridiculous the whole thing seemed. That laugh, however, sparked a reaction that led to a bigger argument—and now some mutual friends think I’m the bad guy for how I handled it. So, AITA for laughing when I found out who she left me for?

AITA for laughing when I found out who my girlfriend left me for?

I’m 19m, my ex is 19f, her ex boyfriend she went back to is 22m.

I’ve been dating her casually for a couple months, and she told me the day before Valentine’s Day that she has been talking to somebody else and wanted to break up with me to be with him.

I asked who, and she said it was her ex. This made me involuntarily laugh because from what she told me + what I’ve heard from mutual friends that know him is a) he’s a diagnosed narcissist b) he is unemployed and lives off his parents and her when she was dating him c) he initially turned her down when she asked him out, asked out another girl, was rejected, and decided to date her. Additionally, I’ve seen him, and he’s honestly not very attractive. So the sheer stupidity of going back to him made me laugh. Breaking up with me is one thing and fair, but how stupid do you have to be to go back to that?

She got angry at me for laughing and said I was just trying to make her feel bad because I’m hurt. I thought about it for a second, and realized I wasn’t hurt. Normally if my girlfriend left me for somebody else, I would have been, but in this case, the fact she’s going back to him of all people made me realize 2 things: 1) she’s making an objectively really stupid decision, and that level of stupidity is unattractive to me, so I didn’t feel I was losing anybody I respect or find attractive on a level beyond physical anymore 2) her making a stupid decision says more about her inability to judge what a good boyfriend would be, more so than my attractiveness.

I told her as such, and she got angry and stormed off. Some mutual friends said I was an asshole for belittling her decision and laughing at her. I think some decisions deserve to be laughed at.

AITA?

Breakups can stir up a lot of emotions—frustration, confusion, and even laughter when things seem absurd. It’s okay to feel those emotions, but how you express them matters.

In this case, your laughter wasn’t just about amusement—it came off as judgment and mockery, especially when directed at someone making a personal choice. Even if you think her decision is irrational or misguided, responding with ridicule (especially to her face) can seem cruel rather than insightful. You may have meant to distance yourself emotionally, but the way you communicated it was hurtful.

Here’s the takeaway: It’s completely valid to feel disbelief or even relief when someone makes a choice you disagree with. But expressing your feelings with empathy and respect—especially when dealing with people you once cared about—shows maturity. Sometimes the best response is to walk away with grace, not with sarcasm.

Let her choices speak for themselves. You don’t have to agree with them, but you also don’t have to tear them down to feel better about your own worth. That confidence will speak louder than any laughter.